I'm A Woman With A Pear Shaped Body Who Is 5'7", Size 16 Jeans. I'm Small On Top With Practically No Bust, Very Short Waist And Have A Long Neck. Everything I Try On Looks Terrible! I Can't Afford A Personal Shopper And Was Hoping Ellen Would Have Me On Her Show And Give Me A Decent Wardrobe. Anyone Got Any Advice?

You can try taking some of your friends shopping with you and have them help pick something out that looks great on you.

There are some clothing websites that categorize their clothes by shape to let you know if something is right for your body time.  I am also pear shaped and going insane with everything baggy on top and tight on the bottom. A couple of these sites are www.zaftique.com and www.igigi.com  

Even if you don't purchase from these sites, they can be helpful. I checked out all the clothing that they recommended for my shape and what styles I should avoid (I learned I'd been fixated on the wrong styles for years). Later, I went clothes shopping (sales of course) and was able to recognise what would be good for my figure and what to avoid .  I'm now getting compliments on my outfits.

I hope this is helpful to you but I have no advice on how to get help from Ellen.

To help you out I'm only 16 I'm 5 ft. 3in. And I love my pear shape my pants are 10 and my bust is still in a (A) cup or (B) cup and I weigh 125 pounds. I first hated because in middle school I was always called fat because my but and hips were huge but I  never cared because now I am beautiful with a shape that lots of girls want??? My mother also have the same but she is 185 and her butt and hips is huge!!!! Lol but be thankful what god gave you!!!! And all clothes fit me well!!!